{"id":18026,"date":"2018-09-14T16:00:06","date_gmt":"2018-09-14T21:00:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mentalhe180dev.wpenginepowered.com\/news\/i-lost-two-brothers-to-suicide\/"},"modified":"2025-10-13T09:17:00","modified_gmt":"2025-10-13T14:17:00","slug":"i-lost-two-brothers-to-suicide","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dev.grafik.mentalhealthfirstaid.org\/es\/news\/i-lost-two-brothers-to-suicide\/","title":{"rendered":"What I Learned After I Lost Two Brothers to Suicide"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"A death by suicide is often met with a would\u2019ve, could\u2019ve or should\u2019ve. If he would\u2019ve told me, maybe I could\u2019ve done something. Even though he never said a word, I should\u2019ve known.<\/span><\/p>\n

Unfortunately, I know a thing or two about suicide \u2013 with an emphasis on two. I lost two brothers, Mark and Matthew, to suicide, 11 years apart and I\u2019ve experienced many would\u2019ve, could\u2019ve and should\u2019ve moments since.<\/p>\n

There are 44,965 suicides every year in the U.S, and the number goes up every year. Which leads me to ask, how do we get it to go down? Even after walking behind the caskets of my brothers Mark and Matthew, I am optimistic that we can change this trend. And by \u201cwe\u201d I mean \u201call y\u2019all\u201d as they say in my adopted home state of South Carolina.<\/p>\n

As a mental health advocate, I know just how many people are impacted by suicide and mental health issues. And I know that the key to turning the tide is to get comfortable talking about mental health.<\/p>\n

So, let\u2019s get to it. Chances are you already know a little or you wouldn\u2019t be reading this blog.\u00a0 Maybe someone you love has been impacted by mental illness. Maybe that person is you. Or you might be completely new to the subject. Either way, you probably want to learn more.<\/p>\n

One of my favorite writers, Julian Barnes, said, \u201cthe more you learn the less you fear.\u201d He goes on to say, \u201c\u2019Learn\u2019 not in the sense of academic study, but in the practical understanding of life.\u201d The practical understanding of life seems to elude us when we deal with mental illness.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve learned a lot from my brothers\u2019 deaths and by speaking about them and their lives. I\u2019ve also learned a lot by taking classes like Mental Health First Aid. A Mental Health First Aid class lasts one business day, but the lessons learned will last a lifetime.<\/p>\n

I learned how to recognize the signs that someone may need help. I learned how to open a conversation and connect them with the resources they may need. And I learned to be more compassionate to those who may be suffering. With the help of Mental Health First Aid we can reduce the number of completed suicides and save lives.<\/p>\n

Love, understanding and education will change the course of these horrible numbers. I\u2019m going to assume you have the love, now go get the learning you need to help save lives. Sign up<\/a> for a Mental Health First Aid class near you and avoid a would\u2019ve, could\u2019ve or should\u2019ve.<\/p>\n

I miss you Mark. I miss you Matthew.<\/p>\n

\n

Dennis Gillan is a mental health advocate who speaks about his experience recovering from the two suicides of his brothers. You can find him here at\u00a0 www.dennisgillan.com<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A death by suicide is often met with a would\u2019ve, could\u2019ve or should\u2019ve. If he would\u2019ve told me, maybe I could\u2019ve done something. Even though he never said a word, … Read more<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":21,"featured_media":18032,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"give_campaign_id":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[193],"topic":[229,244,178],"news-type":[172],"class_list":["post-18026","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-suicide","topic-guest-commentary","topic-men","topic-mental-health","news-type-blog"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nWhat I Learned When I Lost Two Brothers to Suicide<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A death by suicide is often met with a would\u2019ve, could\u2019ve or should\u2019ve.\u00a0I lost two brothers, Mark and Matthew, to suicide, 11 years apart and I\u2019ve experienced many would\u2019ve, could\u2019ve and should\u2019ve moments since. I\u2019ve learned a lot from my brothers\u2019 deaths. 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